Contemporary top-level football is complex. Double pivots, inverted full-backs, gegenpressing, I’ve banned the expression A***ball but that too – I get it. But it’s not overly simplistic to say, at free kicks, get your big bloke on their big bloke. Or don’t get too many players upfield and let teams score on the counter. Or defend a bloody corner properly. And when we have a problem defending set-pieces, don’t give stupid free-kicks away.

What infuriates me are all these mug goals. We are total mugs, handing opportunities to opponents instead of making them work hard for them. Regardless of different tactical approaches, think of how many of the goals we’ve conceded lately are mug goals. Sitting in the Park Lane on Sunday, watching their players’ expressions as they celebrated their goals, they couldn’t believe their luck. Without playing well they held us in check but to score their goals required scant ingenuity or overpowering skill. On Thursday, three unnecessary tackles, three fouls, two goals.

And underlying those fouls is a sense of indecision laced with a liberal dash of panic. Minds as well as limbs are weary after a season of hard yards and tough matches. Nobody took control. Nobody settled things down. Nobody said, let’s be confident in our ability to resist when CFC attack, let’s keep our shape and keep the ball when we get it. Nobody assessed what was happening on the field and said, oi big bloke, get out there to mark that other big bloke. There are no gamechangers out there.

As a fan, I ask for, indeed demand, clarity of thought from players and manager, yet I find that impossible because of my attachment to the club. There’s so much to say, so many things going wrong lately, there’s disappointment and some anger obscuring the progress this season. Perspective is hard when you’re so invested.  

Ange has the right ideas, the right approach and – this is important for me – the right values. He understands the club’s heritage and what supporters want. It’s a philosophy that can change the ethos of the entire club and he has the capacity to get people to believe.

But now we’re at the sharp end of the season, time to take stock and do the accounts. And once more we’re ending a season wanting it to rush by and end before its time. Different players, different manager but that same sinking feeling.  

The biggest, perhaps insurmountable problem Ange faces won’t go away. The weight of expectation has become a burden, as his predecessor discovered and ran away. If anything, he’s added to it because he created such an exciting start to his time in charge, because he was so different from what had gone before.

We fans carry this too. Lately, it seems like each overhit pass carries not only too much weight but also the weight of past frustrations. As each cross sails into the distance, it becomes a symbol of serial failure. Not again, we lament, not again.

Save Our Seniors is the fan campaign to reverse the club’s decision to cut the discount on senior concessions and to not issue any more senior concessions after next season. It’s a disgraceful decision that directly affects not only the club’s most loyal supporters but also reveals how little the club values the loyalty of every fan. The campaign continues – updates on social media @SaveOurSenior66 and I wrote about it last time

So of the many things on my mind, a short list in no particular order.

Key players have disappointed in the second half of the season. Maddison is easily drawn into petty squabbles that distract him. If he wants to be a big player at a big club then he’s got to play like one and run the midfield, rather than be a bit part actor however scene-stealing his cameos are. Bentacur too is off his game, Bissouma is not a strong presence in that key centre mid role, while Sonny gave everything in the Asian Cup, as he should for his country, but he has little left for us.

That said, modern players expect to be coached into a system. I can’t escape the felling that too often our midfielders are not clear where they are supposed to be. They allow huge gaps to open up between them and don’t get this coaching fundamental about connection and awareness. And some of that has to be down to the manager.

I read that Ange has no plan B. While this was never truly accurate, we’ve seen plans B and C this week and neither has made a significant difference to the outcome. To me, the defeat to CFC was the worst of the lot precisely because we changed our set-up to be tighter out of possession and still the Blues easily circumvented our defence. And substituting the complete midfield smacked of desperation rather than a clear plan of action.

Compare with Them Lot up the road – I’m afraid we were forced to on Sunday – they’ve had several years of gradual development and are clearly well-drilled out of possession. They close down space and passing lanes. For a couple of minutes last Sunday, I watched Rice in defence – there was nothing much else to catch my attention. He’s constantly on the move even when in a relatively tight defensive situation, proactively thinking about space and angles. As for us in this respect, let’s just say we have much to learn. And also remember, it took them years and a lot of money to be where they are.

I’ve got to say something about corners. Vicario looks uncertain when earlier in the season I felt he was good at this aspect of his game, given that he doesn’t possess huge physical presence. But it’s wrong to focus all the attention on him. A firm low-ish ball around the packed 6-yard box is a favourite for many clubs at the moment. A lot of keepers have a problem with these. They simply do not have the time let alone the space to get to these crosses.

We don’t defend as a team in these situations. We have no presence at the near post, another reason to miss Harry as he was so effective there. We’re not a big side, and our smaller guys employed to do the blocking as part of the zonal set-up aren’t strong enough and are easily overpowered. Romero and VDV have many attributes but a standing jump without much of a run-up is not one of them. And every other team has at least one player to protect the keeper. We didn’t. Then we did. On Sunday, we didn’t again and gave two goals away at corners. Then we did in the second half when it was too late.

Mug goals, mug tactics. How on earth can we be so disorganised, so weak, so consistently. We adapted with a man to protect Vic, then on Sunday we left him exposed. I simply don’t get it. Admit it, it’s not just me who thinks, what’s the point, heart in mouth time every corner and free kick.

The same can be said for allowing teams to score so easily on the break, a regular feature of recent matches. Attention has focussed on the abilities or lack thereof of individuals – VDV against Newcastle, Davies on Sunday. But isolating a defender, any defender in the world, against a quick skilful forward is the stuff managers’ dreams are made of. Saka didn’t have to beat Davies, all he had to do was pull the ball across him because we left Davies unsupported. Again.

Anyway, that’s got that off my chest. Nobody said the rebuild would be easy. Ange made it appear it was with such a stunning opening to the season. In fact without going over this all again, it will take time, determination and clear thinking to turn around problems embedded in the club psyche, let alone our transfer policy.

Overall this season, we’re up a few points. We’re shite but 5^th, a reasonable foundation to build upon. We know what the manager wants, and we all know from personal experience that we can learn from mistakes as well as successes. The question is, how willing is Ange to adapt? We are too open in midfield out of possession and rubbish at defending set-pieces, so two areas there where little apparent change has taken place despite strong reasons to act.

On the other hand, we forget how relatively inexperienced many of our players are, this is a the first season with a new manager and his very different ways. And we’ve not replaced Harry. Also, and I may be reading too much into this, but against both AFC and CFC, he altered tactics, certainly on Thursday out of possession we looked very different.

On Thursday, Ange was visibly furious at players who were not doing what they should, and yesterday’s press conference he declared, “We need change. Change has to happen.” Good. The question as always is, does the board agree with his plans? Past experience not only casts doubt over this but also tells us that the chairman does not react well to public criticism, overt or implied. Shots fired.   

Prices for next season up 6% and concession pricing hacked to bits. Costs have risen, I get it. But so has the club’s income, yet fans won’t receive any of the benefits. Everyone was expecting an increase, I’m not naïve. The point is, we hear how Spurs are reaping the rewards at last of financial prudence and the income from the new ground, but it seems the fans aren’t part of the equation.   

The decision to limit the number of senior concessions and the amount of the discount is disgraceful, a shameful, offhand disregard of decades of loyalty that impacts longstanding supporters, the people who have been there the longest. Good times and bad. Thick and thin. Thanks for your support. Crap football? We were there. Endless stick from fans of our London rivals? We kept coming. Now pay for it or sod off.

A reminder that not all of this is new. Last season I wrote about how the club had not only confined senior discounts to an increasingly smaller proportion of the ground but also that they had limited the number of tickets they would allocate in each section, which was not openly publicised.

They state that senior concession prices are “not sustainable”. The language is self-justificatory, a given, a fact of life. But this is deliberate obfuscation of reality, which is that they have a sum of money they can use, now and in the future, as they wish, and what they really wish, is, “if we keep the concessions, we make less money.”

With the 6% rise, when the tapered fall in the discount begins the season after the next, the club will get an extra £55.47 per season from me as I have a senior concession seat in the Park Lane. That’s less than the price of a first team shirt. Or between a third and a quarter of a premium seat. Or a tenth of the cost of one person sitting for one game in the best hospitality areas.

Here is an example of something that is sustainable, apparently. Spurs directors gave themselves a rise of almost £3million in the ending June 2022. Daniel Levy earned £3.265m in 2022, in comparison to £2.698m the previous year, while the total pocketed by Tottenham’s directors was £6.773m, up from £4m (source: The Telegraph 24.2.23). That year, Levy was the highest paid director in the PL.

But ultimately, the true indignity for supporters cannot be measured in monetary terms. Your support is wonderful, your loyalty is wonderful, and here’s what you get in return.

I’ve been talking to a lot of Spurs fans for some research. I’ve asked if they think there’s anything distinctive about being a Spurs fan. If you had to explain being a Spurs fan to someone who knows nothing about football, how would you describe us? Almost everyone includes two points in their reply: that we want to watch attacking football and that we are loyal. In our People’s History of support and supporters, Martin Cloake and I traced this back to our early days, even to the marshes when there were no stands. Away games, Europe, Tottenham Hotspur fans will turn up. Not to mention 62000 for every home game for a club that’s won a single League Cup this century. AFC fans staged protest marches to remove their most successful manager since Herbert Chapman, many CFC fans are currently apoplectic after half a poor season, yet we turn up because Tottenham Hotspur will be there.

Levy is fond of describing himself as a custodian of the club and its heritage, but the club is nothing without its supporters. This is a gross, clear-eyed attack on some of the most loyal fans not just in the club but in the UK. Me and Mal, we limp up to row 49 with our walking sticks, I’ve been coming since 67, he’s got an extra ten years on me. And come kick-off, there’s nowhere else in the world I rather be. Means nothing to the board. I’m surprised we haven’t had a email saying we should consider ourselves lucky that we have a concession at all.

Spurs fans, no differently from most fans, don’t expect too much. There is an unspoken bargain between us and the club. We’ll turn up and get behind the team, in return, give us your best. If it doesn’t work out in terms of trophies, that’s a shame but we can handle that, if you do your best. But please, behave like you appreciate we exist, and respect the heritage we hold in our hands and hearts. Not a lot to ask, but too much for the board.

When the prices were announced for the new stadium, I said at the time that the club could be creating a deep well of resentment that will stay underground while the team are doing well but could erupt at any time. The same is true today. Spurs fans are patient, goodness knows we have to be, but that resentment surfaces if it gets too much, and that does nothing to help the team or the manager. None of this is apparently part of the club’s decision-taking. It simply fuels suspicions that as far as the board are concerned, we’re not fans, we’re customer numbers. Worse, it shows that they really don’t understand us at all.

Once again, Spurs create goodwill only to chuck it all down the drain. I’m in favour of the non-football activities at the Lane, provided it doesn’t get in the way of it being a football stadium when we play, and to be fair, it doesn’t. It’s a great place to watch football. So what is the purpose of F1 karting, Pink, Pearl Jam and NFL if it doesn’t in some way benefit Spurs fans? £55.47 a year extra from me though.

And there is a broader context here. The game is changing, with the dominance of finance and the increasing influence of the perceived interests of television and the spectacle it creates. It’s impersonal, undermining fans who go to games and those who want to go but can’t afford it. We don’t want a superleague, blue cards or lengthy VAR delays, or going to Newcastle for a 12.30 kick-off for that matter. That’s if you can get a ticket, given that 20% go to premium season ticket holders. This move reinforces the view that the club doesn’t care. Somebody will sit in the seats, doesn’t matter to them who it is. The distance between club and fan, the game and the fans who love it, grows ever wider.

Still, I’ve got some good news for the board. I’m 68 now and beginning to feel it. Both my parents were dead by the time they were 70, so I guess there’s a chance of something in the genes and I won’t have too much longer. Seems obvious to me that the club are irritated by too many of us veterans living so long, and dying could be my final act of support, because my seat will become available. At full price.

And so the world turns, and the universe restores order. Cosmic forces, eternal and unimpeachable, ensure balance and stability, where yin cuddles yang. Joy and pain. For every action, there’s a reaction.

The things that football fans can’t explain to those who do not follow the game, this is the other bit. For every last minute winner, there has to be a breakaway, only they score it, not us. We spend a lifetime fretting over eleven players kicking a ball. A brutal, recurring reminder that we place our faith, hopes and dreams in their hands and have no control whatsoever over the outcome. How to explain the futility of being a fan to others less disposed towards the game? Probably best to keep that bit quiet, on the whole.

Speak to supporters, any supporters of any team I mean, and ask them what they like most about being a fan, it’s highly likely they will mention being part of the crowd, where you can at once lose yourself and at the same time become part of something far greater than your individuality. The camaraderie, the carnival, celebrating together.

That’s real, I feel it every time I go through the turnstiles or enter the room at a Spurs event. It also functions to fill that pool of empty created by the hopelessness of it all when things go wrong. We celebrate together, but what happens when we need to commiserate collectively? Chatter with friends maybe, drown our sorrows for sure, good options. Being the mature individual I am, I endlessly pout and sulk. I’ve never measured the length of time I can go after a Spurs defeat without making eye contact with other people, but I can go some. And I’m better now than I used to be.

But it does seem to be the case, by and large, than individuals develop their own responses rather than seeking support from the collective. Certainly the barest glance at twitter over the weekend, and these days the barest glance is all that platform gets from me, showed that consolation was in short supply. We are skilled in our practiced denial. There’s always next week, just a blip, we’ll get players back, individual mistake, we’re going in the right direction. This is a pick and mix of self-care. At all costs never admit the abject pointlessness of it all.

I’ve opted for ‘going in the right direction’. We are further down the line than I expected after rebuilding the squad and morale cracked and broken by years of neglect. Spurs are blending a new manager and radically different tactics with new signings, many of whom are relatively young and inexperienced. So many fans seem to have forgotten that young players, however good they are, take time to develop and mature, and along the way, mistakes will be made.

Back at the start of the season, I urged that Ange should be given time and that fans’ biggest contribution could be patience, and I don’t feel any different now. Ironically, this defeat and recent performances feel worse because of early and unexpected successes, where we soared like an eagle rather than playing like the fledgling emerging from the nest. We’ve set ourselves a standard, so it’s clear when we fail to live up to expectations. Noticeable how edgy the Park Lane became whenever we had periods of possession in the final third. Granted we have to keep the tempo up and not pass it for passings sake, but nudging and probing, shifting the ball quickly from side to side, that will bear fruit. The alternative, an aimless cross or blocked shot to appease the impatient crowd, won’t.

The truth is that teams have sussed us out. We know how to move the ball purposefully when we have the space but are leaden and predictable when teams shut down the midfield passing lanes, get onto us quickly by isolating individuals and pack the penalty box. West Ham, Bees first half, Villa, Wolves were the best at it but essential similar. Everton too but they were less able in possession. All of which are reasonable responses to our football – the next step in our evolution is to learn how to break these defences down.

On Saturday, Ange repeated his move against Brentford by having two number 10s in Kulu and Maddison but Wolves were not unsettled and kept their shape, whereas for ten minutes, Brentford lost themselves and the game. I feel Ange has to adapt his approach to ensure more players are in the box. Richarlison is playing well but his is a thankless task, alone in the box, making his near post run only for one of several defenders to easily head the cross away.

The crossing game I get, but we don’t have sufficient presence in the box and crossing to (almost) nobody is a fruitless exercise, as is trying to thread passes through the eye of a needle in the area, a repeated failing of ours this season. It’s not about walking it into the net, it’s simply that there’s no room. To be effective, everything has to be precise, there’s no margin for error. Richie and Werner alongside each other would have been a better option once we needed to equalise, with movement in and out of the area to shift defenders out of their complacency.

I really like the way Ange has faith in his players, but Emerson and Davies can’t do what Udogie and Porro can do. It’s often the case that players improve their reputation by not playing, and Saturday was such a case when Porro’s absence robbed us of dynamism on the right. So, we found out that currently, Ange’s tactics work only when we have our best players available, but then again we stuttered versus those other sides, it’s a team problem. At the back, VDV was outstanding one to one even by his own high standards, but teams know to create a spare man or two by progressing down one flank, usually our right on Saturday, then shifting the ball crossfield. This happened repeatedly and we were lucky Wolves didn’t make more of this.

Two weeks now for Ange to make this work. We have the players with the right skills. Get the full-backs fit. It’s the next stage in Spurs’ evolution, in Ange’s evolution.

With the New Year comes the proliferation of self-improvement advice to enhance physical and mental well-being, and goodness knows I should pay more attention to both. The joys of a late winner are strangely not included in any of the options I’ve come across. I really think the advice gurus are missing a trick here. It’s obvious there’s nothing like it for instant gratification and lasting exhilaration, especially if it’s banged right into the roof of the net, no messing.

This is the bit football fans can’t explain to those who don’t follow the game. Their reactions towards us range from patronising tolerance to outright pity, as we spend a lifetime fretting over eleven players kicking a ball. But we feel sorry for them, because they’ll never feel the heartpumping thrill of a late winner, the uncontrolled limbs of the celebration dance, shared with 62000 strangers. All the things that excite the uninitiated – no, you’ll never feel like we do. Toxins purged, I can face the coming week with renewed enthusiasm. Boring meeting? Tricky situation at work? I’m nodding earnestly but inwardly, I’m smiling. You know why.

Plus the added bonus of being particularly pleased for Johnson. Cost a fortune but looks like a little boy to me. You’ve got to be pleased for him as he needs not just a goal but the confidence that comes from attacking a bouncing ball in the box at a crucial moment so assuredly. He’s a player I so want to come good. And he will. He is.

A game not so much of two halves, more of four quarters. Brighton on top at the start and finishing stronger, Spurs exerting a measure of control before and after half-time. Some disappointment expressed about us but overall, it wasn’t a performance that is straightforward to judge. The value of having almost everybody fit showed in the strength of the bench and the quality of the substitutions available to Ange. However, there’s fit to play, fully fit and Ange fit, the last being the ability to go flat out for 95 minutes. Players coming back from injury and in our case Afcon and the Asian Cup aren’t there yet.

Yet to us, this comes over as them having a bad game. I thought our attacking edge was blunted by Porro and Udogie not getting forward as often. I wondered if this might be tactical tweak to give more cover at the back but probably it was because they are understandably worked so hard.  

Bentancur was another example. He’s a top quality midfielder, no question, but was little influence yesterday, although he improved in the second half before being taken off. Comments this morning that the coaching staff are not expecting him to be up to his pre-injury standards until next season, which puts impatience from fans into context. Also, he was assiduously marked, a Brighton forward going to him as soon as we picked the ball up in defence. They clearly saw him as key to our transition to attack and worked their plans around stifling him.

So I’m not judging him on all that. As for the team, we weren’t as fluent as we have been, and should be. Our movement of the ball in possession was frequently stilted and restricted, but it’s only partly down to us. The next challenge Ange’s Spurs have to face is that teams have sussed us out. In varying degrees, Brighton, Brentford and Everton have taken a similar approach to playing us. They press hard up the field, stay tight on our midfielders if we progress the ball and try to get inside the pass as the receiver prepares to control it. Brighton’s press was better than ours. Time and again in recent games we’ve given the ball away by being caught playing out. Bentancur yesterday gave the ball away at the edge of the box just before their penalty. Udogie and Hojbjerg have been culprits too of late. Our set-up means we are brutally exposed in these situations, despite the pace and strength of our back four. We seldom have extra cover back and are moving to attacking mode as soon as we get the ball. It’s not just about individuals. They have to have (ready yourself for stunning tactical insight ) someone to pass to. The days of Dembele fending off half a midfield on his own are long gone.

Spurs’ approach works best when everyone is flying, at 100%. We give ourselves less margin for error than other teams. I’m all aboard the Ange train until the end of the line. It’s just that watching Spurs protect a lead is a strain at times. Dealing with it is a better guide to my health than the blood pressure meter, I reckon.

Often the best guide to any side’s progress is how well they do when they are playing at 60% or 70% effectiveness. Yesterday, Brighton gave us several scary moments and were on top for extended periods, but they failed to score from open play. Vic made two excellent saves, otherwise they had little on target.

How we respond at the crucial moments in each game is a benchmark of how we are doing. Kulu was in and out, but that pass to Sarr for the opener was instant, and a gem. Maddison didn’t dominate but makes something happen. VDV conceded the penalty but made several vital interventions. And our winner was a terrific piece of football, the pass to Sonny, his run and Johnson, again off the pace when he came on, delivered when it mattered.

Good for my heart and soul to be back at the Lane. I watched the City and Brentford games from my sofa rather than the South Stand, a victim of the governing principle of the universe, Sod’s Law. For perfectly reasonable caring reasons, I prefer to stay home most nights. Faced with the prospect of three Spurs’ outings in 10 days or so, I opted for the launch of Julie Welch’s new book about the best Tottenham strike partnerships (out now, highly enjoyable and recommended) and the City game. However, at the last minute I couldn’t attend the latter as the dog was being sick repeatedly in every room of the house. It’s the glamour of my life that gets too much, truly. And as I move to remove my Bees ticket from the exchange, the email arrives to say it’s sold.

It’s worse at home, watching the gaping fissures open up in our defence, like the TV documentaries covering millennia of earth’s history by fast-forwarding a graphic of shifting tectonic plates, rift valleys and mountains. The Brentford game was the prime example of the ‘we’ll score one more you’ elements of our manager’s approach, and we did, in the end, so that’s alright then. Or is it? It was hard watch at times, even at the end with three centre halves. We shouldn’t have to rely on unaccountable opposition misses in both games, although when City pinned us back, we defended well for the most part. Brentford will be furious that they did not score a third, though.

But Thomas Frank is a canny operator. He kept it tight at the back and told two strikers to stay up top, with the dangerous Toney often drifting wider right to open up more space and more doubt in the minds of VDV and Romero. Ange wants defenders who are good one-to-one, that’s what ‘s got in our first choice back four. More sophisticated tactical analysis is available but two v two like this with Porro and Udogie pushed inside in midfield and we’re always going to be onto a loser at some point in the game, however good that partnership is, in my view very, very good.

In praise of Vicario. He’s an excellent keeper. His saves, acrobatic again yesterday, his presence, his speed off the line – I could go on. I question the level of recent criticism about dealing with set pieces. This season he’s been good at the physical side, especially given his stature. He goes for the ball and usually gets it. I don’t accept this ‘could be stronger’ stuff. He never takes a backward step and confidence is unaffected by problems – next time it comes over, he’s going for it. There is little he or any keeper can do if he is fouled. Everton hassled him. Sometimes it was legitimate physical contact, sometimes he was fouled, and their first goal is a blatant foul.

Other teams protect their keeper, and yesterday Maddison took on that duty. Although I detest managers refereeing from their press conference (Pep, Arteta, Klopp all do it, as did JM), I’m glad Ange played the game and spoke to PGMOL about this. It’s now in referees’ minds.

A final word for Sonny. Already much loved, his reception yesterday was deafening and elevated his status to the returning hero we all need.